Strange Positive Experiences at the DMV
There is is something irresistible finding ourselves in situations where we expect a horrible experience only to be pleasantly surprised. We can all make a world of difference for the people around us by looking for those opportunities to turn a bad experience into better ones. That contrast sticks in our memories sometimes for a lifetime.
Isn’t there something irresistibly wonderful being in a situation where we’re expecting a horrible experience only to be pleasantly surprised to have a much better one? This morning I knew I needed to call the DMV. I almost thought it would be a waste of time because I had projected such a horrible experience where after being on hold with horrendous elevator music, I would be tossed around from one agent to the next only to be told ultimately that I would have to come in person to sign a form or to show proof of residency for to sell my first born child for the honor of five minutes of their time.
But I thought it would be worth a try and I did my best to think positively. Initially I was put on hold which isn’t the best sign, but the system told me how long I’d be waiting and someone connected with me a little bit before the time was elapsed. The gentleman who assisted me first seemed friendly, helpful, and eager to set things up for success. He connected me with the right person, but he stayed on the line to ensure I connected and to introduce me and my situation to the local agent who also seemed very eager to help and in an amazing short amount of time, I had my issue handled and they even went over and beyond and found out what the root problem was and fixed it right then and there so that in the future I wouldn’t even need to spent the 15 minutes that I had spent that morning in the future.
Needless to say, I have a very different perspective and opinion of the DMV today than I have had ever since I first got my drivers license at one many years ago. Now, I’m not naive enough to think that this one experience should dispel all of the horror stories I’ve heard nor the lack luster experiences I’ve had personally, but my view of the agency has shifted in a major way. Now whenever someone cracks a joke about DMVs or the next time I watch Zootopia you can bet that I will think about this positive experience.
What is it about expecting bad things that makes for such a thrillingly brilliant experience when our expectations end up being absolutely wrong? I think it has a lot to do with contrast. Our eyes rely on contrast to be able to distinguish between objects and the horizon from the distant mountains. Have you’ve ever looked out at the ocean on a particularly grey and cloudy day, you very well might have a hard time determining where the sea meets the sky. Ansel Adams photographs are iconic for many reasons, but personally one of the reasons why I find his photos so striking is because the scenes absolutely pop due to the shimmering contrast.
It’s an interesting reality that most humans thrive when they have high points in their lives to look forward to: vacations, weekends off of work, special family events, or holidays. Even though we almost always deal with some let downs when those high points are over. The January dull-drums after the holidays, the dread of going back to work after a fantastic road trip and so forth. But yet we can’t help but start building up expectations for the next peak in life experience even when we are dealing with the withdrawals from the last one. It’s completely natural to do all we can to avoid business as usual.
All of this is to say that I’ve really be thinking about how I can bring some unexpected goodness for others. It’s amazing how many chances we get to do that almost every day. The pleasant smile given to the guy in the car next to you in traffic. The goofy face you make for the crying child in the grocery store that might turn a tired sob into a laugh and that might also give the tired mother a few moments of peace. The two minute phone call you make for a friend just to let them know that you were thinking about them. The loaf of bread you leave with a simple note at the doorstep of a neighbor just to let them know that you appreciate them. The text message to someone who you think might be feeling lonely or sad.
The beauty of these sorts of things is that they are such simple gestures but since the people receiving them aren’t expecting them and might actually be bracing themselves for a bad experience, that shining that ray of sunshine in their direction could make all the difference. The fact that I still remember several instances where people did that for me even decades ago makes me think that most of us have those same instances in our memory banks too. What a world of a difference we can all make.